Child Socialization

CHILD SOCIALIZATION

From 2 years on, your child needs contact with other youngsters if he doesn't already have it. Child socialization is as essential to wholesome development as are food and sleep, and you must provide it in some way. If there are no children in the neighborhood, arrange frequent visits with friends who have children the same age. The ideal social contact for your youngster is in a good nursery school, if there is one in your community.
 

Social development is a learning process and, like any other, unfolds gradually. Your 2-year-old is still largely nonsocial, Most of the time he'll play by himself, and won't concern himself with the children around him unless they interfere with him in some way. Yet he needs the chance to become accustomed to children his own age.
 

Fairly soon, you'll find him stopping to watch the others, and he'll do this more and more frequently. Next, he includes one or more other youngsters in his play. His first advances are apt to be physical—pushing, pulling, or hitting. He uses playmates as he does the rest of his environment, and with no more ill will. He must learn from sad experience—for his victim will hit back—not to trespass upon the rights of others.
 

Presently he's playing with another child in co-operative enterprise. Gradually the group enlarges, and by the time he's 3, your little fellow will probably be a happy member of a neighborhood "gang" of small children and be having the time of his life.
 

It's an advantage for him to play with both older and younger children. In this manner, he'll learn to both lead and to follow.
 

In your child's relations with other children, interfere just as little as possible once you have provided suitable playmates. Let him attack his problem of social learning in his own way, pick his own chums, and form his own groups.
 

SELF RELIANCE CHILDREN

 

One of the principal goals of this period is to develop your child's self-reliance. He has already learned to feed himself. In the same way, he'll want to perform from time to time the other operations of his daily routine. He'll try to lace his shoes, put on his stockings, although there'll be no doubt that he'll do a better job of taking them off.
 

At first, these efforts are futile and of short duration. Wait patiently. The attempt will grow more effective, and soon, with a little help, your child can really manage. Each accomplishment of this sort is a step forward in his development. You can't make better use of your time than to stand by while his awkward, little fingers work out the problem.
 

Many parents are eager to "push" their children, to teach them to do things much earlier than they are actually capable of doing them. These parents are constantly struggling to get their child to accomplish things faster than their neighbor's child.
 

Well, if we play like I'm a boy, will you let me play soldiers and Indians with you?

 

For some reason, it's important that their little one be eating solids first, drinking from a cup first, walking first, and on through a whole list of accomplishments.
 

Walking, talking, eating without help, and learning other physical tasks are accomplished at an optimum age, although with a bit of effort and work on your part, your youngster might do these things a few months earlier.
 

But why bother? The playmate who learns at his own speed or at the normal rate of development is just as capable by the time he reaches kindergarten as the child who's been pushed by overambitious parents.
 

Each stage in growing up has its special delights. As parents, relax and enjoy your children. Let babies be babies, and toddlers be toddlers. You'll all be much happier.
 

Learning to dress himself is a long process. It must be taken gradually, or your run-about will tire of it. Undressing himself is much easier and should come first. It may become something of a nuisance, because this is the age when children like to undress themselves when you'd rather they stay dressed.
 

It's not uncommon for a 2-year-old to take his shoes and socks off, or take his pants off and run around the house with nothing on. Or, he'll want to take off one set of clothes and try to put on another outfit. Patience!
 

He's ready to begin dressing himself when he starts to identify the parts of his clothing and to know where they go. At first, though, he's able to do little more than get his clothes out of a drawer or closet and put them away; not always correctly but he's trying.
 

Your role in this first stage is to provide clothing he can manage and to stimulate his interest in dressing himself. Keep his attention on the job in hand, prevent distractions and play, and direct him in the simplest parts of the routine. Let him think he's doing a great deal himself, even though you do practically everything. If kept busy, he'll feel he has accomplished a big and important job.
 

When he develops an interest in dressing himself, instruct and assist only when necessary. This period requires patience, for you are able to get him in and out of his clothes faster than he can. Only with actual practice can he advance in skill
and the desire to handle the matter himself. He'll probably "me do it" anyway!
 

As he becomes fairly adept in dressing himself, he loses interest. By this time, he does it with comparative ease. Your job now is to keep him on the job and maintain order, without giving him more than casual attention.
 

If you follow these directions, your child will he able to dress himself fairly well by the time he's 4, except for difficult fastenings. He can't be expected to manage things like back buttons before he nears 5.

Back to 2 Year Olds Development